ruined cake parfaits

Good grief, did this holiday season kick anyone else in the pants? I realize we're more than halfway into January (how did that even happen?!) and have gotten back into the swing of reality, but all I really want to do is have a solid lie-down and binge watch The Great British Baking Show in my pajamas.

I suppose our holiday break got off to a bad start when our car broke down (at 1:30am, on a dirt/mountain road, in a storm), and was punctuated by various unforeseen events (including more car trouble) through the New Year. I mean, really, everything was okay in the grand scheme of things (and the car trouble meant we were able to have more time with family), but it felt like each day something made us say, "WHOA, okay... guess we're dealing with this, now." We're both still reeling a bit.

And then last week, on a day when I really needed things to go right, I baked a cake.

And it SUCKED.

It stuck to the pan, the top came out strangely tough while the inside was quite delicate and almost under-baked, it didn't rise the way I expected... blah. It has been a while since I've adapted a cake recipe, and I had forgotten how devastating it can feel to put a lot of time and effort and care into making a cake and have it not turn out the way you want. Granted, I did mess around with the recipe quite a bit, but in a way that I honestly thought would turn out okay, if not extremely well. That probably sounds arrogant, but CLEARLY I WAS WRONG ANYWAY.

Phoo.

So, when we bake a cake and it turns out wrong, what do we do? Do we cry (maybe), do we eat a lot of the part that was stuck to the pan (probably), or do we find a way to remedy the situation (um, sure?)?

Some ways have already been devised to rescue weird cakes (remember cakepops?), but usually when I am making a cake, it is because it is a celebration or special event of some kind, and I want to make something a little more special or fancy. It also usually means that I am cooking other things, and I don't have the time or wherewithal or emotional capacity to deal with stuff like tempering chocolate and finding skewers or popsicle sticks.

No time like the present to break out a good old parfait.

A parfait is, in its most elemental form, layers of cake or cookies, whipped cream, and fruit. Sometimes the cream has other things going on with it, like mascarpone or creme fraîche whipped in (or maybe a wee bit of booze). I personally like my whipped cream tempered with yogurt in a 1:1 ratio. It is just rich enough for dessert, but still feels quite light and has a pleasantly subtle tang; you could serve it for breakfast and nobody would say boo.

So next time you plan to make a cake, on the off-chance it decides to be temperamental, grab a pint of cream, a container of yogurt, and some fruit just in case you need to perform some parfait magic, and no one will EVER know that your cake was a near-disaster. Unless, of course, you write a blog post about it later.

(Also, Richard and I agree that we like this so much that we'd make it again with a not-ugly cake, too! Though I may save at least the next good cake for something else, if only for my ego's sake.)

serves 6

You can scale this recipe up or down quite easily, depending on the number of people you want to serve; just keep the 1:1 cream to yogurt ratio.

I was testing out a recipe for a sesame cake when I made these parfaits, and decided to use cara-cara oranges and lime zest to go with the sesame flavor. The combination was out-of-this-world good, and I'll be sure to share the recipe for the sesame cake once I get it dialed. Serve this cream with any cake you like, and with any fruit you like, but here's a quick thought regarding chocolate cake - I'd actually replace the yogurt in the cream with mascarpone, as I think it would taste better to have something slightly richer and less tangy to go with the chocolate.

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1 cup full or low fat plain yogurt
1 cup heavy whipping cream
2-3 tablespoons sugar (optional)
1 teaspoon vanilla (optional)

1 cake, sliced or broken into bite-sized pieces
fresh fruit, cut into slices or chunks (reserve a few pieces for garnish)
lime/citrus zest (optional)

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Whisk together the yogurt and cream in a large bowl. If the yogurt and cream are not straight-out-of-the-fridge cold, place the bowl into the fridge for 15-20 minutes to chill (it won't whip properly if it is not cold). In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with a whisk attachment or with a hand whisk, beat the yogurt/cream until soft peaks form. Continue beating for a few more seconds to stiffen the mixture, but keep it somewhat billowy and soft (it will look prettier and be easier to layer).

Layer the cake, cream, and fruit in individual glass jars or wine glasses, beginning with the cake and ending with the cream. Garnish each parfait with a piece of fruit and some fresh citrus zest, if desired. Refrigerate until ready to serve

mayan chocolate roll-out cookies

Posting a cookie recipe around the holidays always feels like risky business because most folks interested in baking and general merry-making seem to have figured out their cookie game plan. So you should feel like you can take or leave this recipe, but I would encourage you to take it if you have a spare evening and some butter lying around. It is a solid chocolate roll-out dough recipe, and you can leave out the chili powder and cinnamon bells and whistles if that feels like too much for you. But to quote a good friend, the "latent, lingering heat [of the spices] is so pleasing." Sort of like liquid jacket, but with cookies.

I've got your attention now, haven't I? ;-)

If you're new to the business of royal icing, here are some of handy tips for decorating your cookies with maximum enjoyment and minimal frustration:

1. Invest in a piping tip - you have probably seen people ice cookies using a sandwich bag with the end snipped off, but it is difficult to guarantee that you'll be able to pipe in a straight line and that the thickness of your line will be consistent (since the opening may stretch or tear). You'll more likely set yourself up for a frustrating time if you refuse to use a piping tip or other, rigid tip (such as that of a squeeze bottle, which has its own limitations). I put a piping tip into a sandwich bag so that I could seal the bag and save the icing from drying so that it could be used over multiple days. Find icing tips at gourmet specialty shops (such as Sur la Table) or online. I like using a plain, round tip (such as an Ateco #2 or #4) for royal icing since I make mine somewhat fluid and it won't hold textures or ridges.

2. Move your piping tip at the same speed as the icing flows - moving at the same speed means that you're more likely to create straight lines, and that your lines will be the same thickness as the piping tip. Move too quickly, and you'll create thin lines (or your lines might break as you pipe them). Move too slowly, and you may end up with thicker or clumpy sections in your lines, or your lines may look more wobbly. Practice on a few cookies or on parchment paper to get a feel for your icing's consistency/flow rate.

3. Work from the outside in whenever possible - this helps to ensure consistency in your design and makes it a lot easier to create "perfect" looking cookies.

4. Practice, and don't beat yourself up while you're learning! The point is to have fun with this. Worst case, you can always dump sprinkles on your funkiest designs and they will look fabulous.

adapted from this recipe - makes roughly 3 dozen 3.5 inch cookies

This recipe is a little different from some in that some of the dry ingredients are mixed in with the wet ones before the flour is added. I found that I liked being able to beat the hell out of the batter when adding the cocoa powder without worry of gluten development from flour, so I am a big fan of this method for this particular recipe. If you choose to whisk the spices/baking powder/cocoa powder into the flour, then just continue with the "add the flour in three additions" part of the recipe, and be careful not to overmix your dough.

Also, I used the smaller amounts of spices when making this dough the first time, and while they added a really delightful something to the dough, I also like using them in slightly larger quantities to pack more of a punch.

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1 cup butter, at room temperature
1 1/4 cups sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
3/4 teaspoon baking powder
3/4-1 teaspoon chili powder (I used Rancho Gordo)
1/2-3/4 teaspoon cinnamon
1 teaspoon kosher salt
2/3 cup natural cocoa powder
3 cups all-purpose flour

Royal Icing, to decorate (recipe follows)

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Cream together the butter and sugar in the bowl of a stand mixer until light and fluffy. Add the eggs one at a time and mix to combine, scraping down the sides of the bowl with a spatula in between each egg. Add the vanilla, and mix to combine.

Whisk together the baking powder, chili powder, cinnamon, and kosher salt, and add to the bowl. Mix well to combine, scraping down the sides of the bowl if necessary. Add the cocoa powder and again mix well to combine (I just left my mixer running for 2-3 minutes at this point).

Add the flour in three additions, scraping down the sides of the bowl and mixing just to combine in between each addition. Do not overmix. Form the dough into a round and wrap in plastic wrap. Chill in the refrigerator for at least 30 minutes or overnight.

While the dough chills, preheat your oven to 350˚F. Line two baking sheets with parchment paper.

Remove the dough from the fridge and divide in half. Place one half on a floured surface, and wrap the second in the plastic while you work with the first. Roll out into a 1/4-inch thick sheet (if the dough cracks or is hard to work with, let it rest for 15-20 minutes to warm up a bit). Cut into desired shapes and place on the parchment lined baking sheet. Once one baking sheet is full, place it in the oven to bake for 7-10 minutes while you cut more cookies.

Once the cookies are baked (I ended up liking the ones in the 8-9 minute bake range the best), remove them to a wire rack to cool (leave the parchment sheet on the pan for more cookies). Place the second pan in the oven to bake while you cut more cookies. Note: make sure to let the pans cool a little bit before putting unbaked cookies on them... this way they don't melt a little or lose their shape before making it to the oven. Reroll and cut any scraps. Repeat cutting/baking with the second round of dough once you've finished with the first.

Once cooled, cookies may be iced or stored in an airtight container at room temperature for up to a week.

ROYAL ICING
makes 1 cup

There are many different ways to make royal icing depending on whether you're using dehydrated egg whites, meringue powder, or fresh egg whites. I couldn't find dehydrated egg whites, and the meringue powder I found had a lot of funky-sounding additives, so I used a fresh egg white. The double-boiler method allows you to cook the egg white without making scrambled eggs and gives you a pure, white color.

If you can find pasteurized egg whites, Alton Brown has a great recipe here.

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1 large egg white
1 cup powdered sugar, divided

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Combine the egg white with 1/3 cup of powdered sugar in the bowl of a double-boiler (or in a heatproof bowl set over simmering water) and whisk to combine. Cook gently over the simmering water, whisking constantly, until the mixture reads 155˚F on a thermometer (do NOT stop whisking or let it boil). Remove from the heat and add the remaining powdered sugar, whisking constantly to combine until the sugar dissolves (briefly place it back over the heat if necessary to dissolve any lumps). Add a teaspoon or two of water if your icing seems too thick (I like to pick up a little icing with the whisk or a spoon and trail it over the surface - it should leave a ribbon, but be reabsorbed into the rest of the icing within 5 seconds or so).

gjelina's squash, olive oil, and chocolate cake

I woke up yesterday still wearing my Buddy Christ shirt from Halloween (guess who we were!) and feeling mildly sugar hungover + for reals hungover + a bit discombobulated by how bright it was given that my phone read 7:35 am. So I made coffee and decided to go through this month's Book of the Month, Gjelina, and find some things to make for you all.

This squashy chocolate-studded loaf was one of the very last recipes, and it looked so very pretty and easy enough that my brain could handle making it in spite of the metaphorical coat hanger crammed into my skull. You sift together the dry ingredients, mix up the wet ones, combine them briefly and fold in the chocolate, and pour the whole thing into a pan. If you've ever made pancakes or muffins or put together an IKEA bookcase, this recipe is going to be cake for you (bahaha).

I'm so sorry, all of the candy has made me especially weird today.

I, like most of America, am all about the pumpkin-spiced stuff, but I was somewhat surprised that one of my favorite parts of this recipe ended up being the glaze. It's a simple powdered sugar glaze that is fortified by olive oil, and good lord, is it delicious. I ate most of it out of the bowl and felt thoroughly sugared afterwards, but it was completely worth it. I think I might borrow it and use it to glaze this cake. Travis suggests omitting the glaze if serving this cake for breakfast, but don't do it, I beg of you. It's really fantastic, and it helps to cut through the richness of the cake (which, with the oil content and chocolate, is certainly up there, though in a very good way).

If anything, if you want it to be more breakfasty, halve the chocolate. I know, I can't believe I said that either.

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GJELINA'S SQUASH, OLIVE OIL, AND CHOCOLATE CAKE
Makes 1 9x5-inch loaf - serves 8-12

The original recipe calls for you to make your own kabocha squash purée, which adds some depth of squashy flavor. I've adapted the recipe for using canned pumpkin, but if you'd like to make your own purée, there are instructions at the end of the recipe.

1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 1/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 Tbsp ground cinnamon
2 tsp freshly ground nutmeg
1/4 tsp kosher salt
1 1/3 cups granulated sugar
1 cup extra virgin olive oil
1 cup canned pumpkin purée or homemade squash purée
3 eggs
8 oz bittersweet chocolate, finely chopped

FOR THE GLAZE:
1 1/4 cups confectioner's sugar, sifted, plus more as needed
2 Tbsp hot water, plus more as needed
3 Tbsp extra-virgin olive oil

3 Tbsp pepitas (raw, hulled pumpkin seeds), toasted in a dry skillet until nutty and browned
2 Tbsp crushed cacao nibs

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Preheat the oven to 325˚F, and generously butter a 9x5-inch loaf pan.

Whisk (or sift) together the flour, baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon, nutmeg, and salt in a medium bowl. In a large bowl, whisk together the sugar, olive oil, pumpkin purée, and eggs. Add the dry ingredients to the bowl with the wet ingredients and whisk until just combined. (Adding the dry ingredients to the wet ingredients helps to prevent little dry pockets in the bottom of the bowl.) Fold in the chopped chocolate.

Pour the batter into the prepared pan and bake for 75 to 90 minutes, or until a skewer inserted in the center of the cake comes out clean. Let the cake cool in its pan on a wire rack for 20 minutes. Run an icing spatula or a thin knife carefully around the edges, and invert the cake from the pan. Re-invert the cake so that it is right-side-up and let cool on the rack for another 20 minutes. Transfer to a serving plate.

To make the glaze: In a small bowl, whisk the confectioner's sugar with the water until smooth. Add more sugar and/or water until you have a glaze that is the consistency of honey. Slowly drizzle in the olive oil, whisking constantly to combine.

Pour the glaze over the cake, allowing it to drip down the sides. Sprinkle with the pepitas and cacao nibs and let the glaze set completely (about 1 hour) before serving.

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To make your own squash purée: Remove the seeds from a 1-pound piece of kabocha squash and drizzle the squash with olive oil. Place squash cut-side down on a baking sheet and roast in a preheated 425˚F oven for 30-45 minutes, until the squash is very soft and beginning to caramelize around the edges. Remove from the oven and let cool. Scrape out the soft flesh into the bowl of a food processor, and pulse until smooth.

Place the puréed squash on a large square of cheesecloth, and wrap into a tight bundle. Put the bundle into a colander, and place over a large bowl. Let drain at least 4 hours, or up to overnight. Twist the top of the bundle to squeeze out any additional liquid. Unwrap the drained squash, and measure out 1 cup of purée for the cake recipe. Cover and refrigerate any remaining purée for another use (may be stored for up to 5 days).

antioxidant power oatmeal

This isn't exactly a recipe, but it's my favorite thing to eat for breakfast when camping or backpacking (this is what we ate on the Amethyst Basin backpacking trip). Oatmeal gives me the warming boost I want for my belly (and my hands) in the morning, and it gives me enough energy to carry me through until a late-morning snack or lunch on a high-activity day. Adding in trail mix with lots of seeds and berries makes it flavorful and texturally interesting, while the nut butter makes it creamy and luxurious and even more stick-to-your-ribs-y.

There aren't solid quantities in this recipe because you should make as much or as little as you want to eat, and add as much and as little trail mix/nut butter as you want to have! The world is your oyster.

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ANTIOXIDANT POWER OATMEAL
Serves 1

rolled or instant oats
hearty trail mix (see below for my favorite add-ins)
nut butter

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Put about 1/2 cup of oats into a bowl. Pour some boiling water over the oats (a lot or a little, depending on how thick you like your oatmeal) and let sit for a minute or two to soften the oats.

Stir in as much trail mix and nut butter as you want. Now, eat it!

My favorite trail mix for this breakfast usually contains most or all of the following:

pumpkin seeds (pepitas)
goji berries and/or cranberries
currants and/or raisins
walnuts and/or cashews and/or almonds
cacao nibs
candied ginger pieces